Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
Randomize
