so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
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