HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
Randomize
