You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
When I told my mom I was having a rough time, she responded with "pop a xanax, take a nap, and when you wake up all will be right with the world." My mom is finally starting to shape up.
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
Randomize
