Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
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