Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
do herpes really smell.
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
there's nothing weirder than waking up to your mom eating breakfast on the couch that you fucked her coworker on last night.
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
Randomize
