Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
I woke up (not at home) to find out I kissed Ryan Caberra, flashed for free gumbys and carried around an inflatable moose named Johnson. Great success.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
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