I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
Pooping to opera.
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
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