Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize
