Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
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