dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
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