I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in.
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
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