Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up"
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
Randomize
