Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
You should know I just got pulled aside by TSA because they found a bottle of Bud Light in my backpack... Thanks for that...
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
Randomize
