Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
Randomize
