I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
Randomize
