Baby momma caught me doing baby daddy in reverse cowgirl. She kicked me out and i have no clothes, come get me.
I hope you walked the shit out of that shame.
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
I'm in the grocery store cradling a box of wine like it's my firstborn, so of course this would be the first and only time I've ever seen my boss outside of the office.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
Randomize
