Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
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