on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
Randomize
