We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
and you fell through a lawn chair
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
Randomize
