ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
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