? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
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