once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
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