im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
Last night drunk me texted a sure to be hungover me my class schedule and locations for today. I'm like a mom preparing her child for the first day of school
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
Randomize
