I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
Is Oprah even human
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
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