I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
Randomize