thus making me awesome and them whores
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
Randomize