I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
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