Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
Randomize
