I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
Randomize
