Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
I walked in on my roommate finishing watching something on his computer. There was cum all over his screen. He awkwardly said hi and pulled up his pants.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
Randomize
