when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
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