He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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