singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
Randomize
