Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
We are two peas in an std pod
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
You showed up at 4 a.m with two middle-aged men, a 200 dollar bottle of wine, three bottles of beer, no shoes on, and a half eaten red velvet cake.You are never drinking absinthe again.
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
Randomize