it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
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