I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
Randomize