Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
Randomize