So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
today i learned why jack sparrow loved rum so fucking much
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
Randomize
