Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
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