just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
He chugged from a bottle of wine and then we had pretend sex
How do you have pretend sex?
It was bad...so it was pretend
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
