And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize
