is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
Randomize