ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
I woke up to a topless girl handing me a blunt. Candidate for greatest wake-up ever?
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
Pretty sure I just had sex with the black kid who grew up in a car from "angels in the outfield"
How come I never meet celebrities?
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
You may now shotgun with the bride
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
Randomize