I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
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