i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
Why the fuck do they always fuck on couches in porn?
Don't ever text me while you're jacking off. EVER.
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
I swear to god I'm going to hunt down and stab the next telemarketer that calls from a blocked number while I'm waiting for my STD results...
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
Randomize
