i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
of course. lets lasso hookers.
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
Randomize
