Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
i need some magic done to my vagina
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
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