oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
Your first words after putting out the flames, "how am I supposed to eat girls out with my top lip burned off??"
Yeah no more flaming everclear shots.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
