I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
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