I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
Randomize
